I have my fair share of events that I attended and have visited family and friends in many countries. All these events and moments make me think and reach to the conclusion that hospitality is a universal concept that not all people practice.
Being hospitable in general, it relates to the ability to entertain friends, guest or visitors. It is synonym to be friendly and generous. I enjoy receiving people at my home. My house is genuinely open to family and friends who would like to stop by, stay for a while and sometimes, it has been a refuge when there have been emergencies because of the weather.
Lately, there have been some events that made me think about the differences between each host I had the pleasure to meet and enjoy. Not all of them have the grace of what I call a good host. I realized that hospitality is really an art. Not everybody masters the art of being a good host but there are some key characteristics that all hosts who have impressed me have in common.
I have the good fortune of being pampered by great hosts who have been warm, honest and more than anything making sure that each guest feels special. Entertain your guest with food and drinks is important but the difference between the house keeper and a host is that the latter, takes the time to develop a something personalized for their guests. The host ensure that the glass is never empty, that the guest have available and accessible water to stay hydrated, who lead and present and ambience of respect and admiration.
A true host takes time of their itinerary to receive and talk to his/her visitors and/or guests. Always! It is giving a little bit of heart to each person they get in contact with. A great host is genuine and part of being genuine is being generous in time and kindness.
There are several types of host: the party host, the ambassador, the close-knit host and several other variants however, I noticed certain common characteristics in all types of good host that I can summarize in five:
- A good host is nurture by having people around. This does not mean that the host is an extrovert or introvert. It means that they are open to other people further of their family nucleus. It is part of their charisma this openness to people. These are people who go beyond their ego, showing a genuine interest in the well-being of other people. They are conscious of who they are and their environment and their impact on other people.
- A good host has a clean environment and look. Some of the best that I have the pleasure to meet, do not have much, but what they have is clean, organized accompanied with a soft kind expression on their faces that transform everything around them in kindness. This does not mean that the place is impeccable and that their clothing is by high end designers. Their appearance and aura are soft, affable which makes them attractive and their presence lead the ambience of the affair.
- It is mentally organized. There are host that plans everything by the hour, there are others that works on a timeframe without an established time per task, there are host that finish or focus on the most difficult tasks and there are others that focus on a lot of small and easy tasks at first and deal with the most difficult one’s at last. What all of these have in common is that they have a plan (or more than one plan) no matter the order of the elements. They follow their plan and adjust it accordingly to the “surprises” that can be encounter.
Last year was the birthday celebration of an important family member. The celebration was in another family member home therefore the rest of us, would help the host with other items of the celebration but the plan was very random if there was a plan. The host prepared their home with plenty of food and drinks and some sort of cute whimsical theme as decoration. It usually rains but the weather forecast predicted sun although the forecast in that area tends to change constantly. Everything was prepared to be outdoors, but it rained and when the birthday arrived, they missed to organize or prepare a table for the birthday cake. The person who brought the cake, had to improvise an area for the cake but because of the rain the cake finished in a corner in the kitchen.
It does not matter how informal the event is, the guest feels comfortable in a safer place with direction instead of leaving the guest to randomly entertain themselves.
- Is an Observer.This is the most difficult trait. Peripheral vision is needed to receive guest, talk to them and be aware that the glass of a guest is not empty, that appetizers are reunion out, that a guest is not alone in a corner, that a guest is not monopolizing conversations. The host needs the right judgement to intervene or to lower or increase the volume of the music. Sometimes is taking the initiative to order an Uber for the guest that is not in condition to drive.
It does not matter how much help the host has, a good host should observe his/her activity, before, during and after it.
- They make you feel special! From the moment that the guest passes the entrance, a good host express how happy they are of seeing their guests. It reminds in casual way, how honored of having each guest during introductions and presentations.
Several weeks ago, I witnessed how a host avoided to interact with some family member s visiting from another country. I am not sure what history is or the reason but, the end result was detrimental for the host. It looked classless and immature.
I have noticed that great hosts are people who are genuine good friends. It is not coincidence that these people are focus on common wellbeing and not only their individual needs. Personally, I don’t have to think twice when I receive an invitation from someone, I consider a good host to RSVP that I will attend but in other occasion I have the obligation to go to activities that I want to only make an appearance. But that it is another story about what is to be a good guest
DRV
Leave a Reply